It's Time

It was midnight, everyone was fast asleep but me. I could hear snores bouncing from room to room and I could feel the wind bustling which gave me chills down my spine and noticeably rough goosebumps on my arms. I was walking around the entire room, from closet to drawer, gathering a bunch of my clothes and organizing them into my suitcase that was already too full to have any other things be put inside. I sat on top of it, trying to push all my weight down so that it would be easier to zip up. After a good 10 minutes trying to zip this thing up, I brought all the things I was taking on the trip together in one pile. Taking a good look at the time, I realized that in just a couple of hours, I'll be on my way to the airport leaving for my destination. That means forcing myself to get a good night's rest, knowing that I won't be getting much sleep on the plane, considering that I won't be able to find a comfortable position in a seat that won't recline, nor have much arm or leg space. But getting enough sleep wasn't really what left me with my mind so full. Pacing slowly back and forth, I felt my arms beginning to tense up a bit as I began to think loudly to myself.

It was the first choir trip without my mom. These trips, my mom always came along, but not this time. My head was very conflicted and in fact, I think I was hallucinating. I could hear voices arguing in my head about the wonders and joys of not having a parent around for a week. But for some reason, I didn't really like the idea. All these years, I've only spent one night away from my parents and that was for a school retreat. In just a couple of hours, I'll be gone a week away from them, on the other side of the United States. I tried thinking optimistically, "It's not going to be that bad. A week not being told what to do and a week exploring the 'Big Apple' with my closest friends. I can so do this!"

Beep Beep Beep Beep. My alarm rang. I hadn't even realized I fell asleep. I got up so slow and sluggishly. I can't believe I was the last to wake up considering that I'm normally the first, but I guess it was my lack of energy. Dad already had all my bags stuffed into the car. I felt the urge to move even slower as it seemed like my parents just couldn't wait to get rid of me.

Getting to the airport, I see my friends, my choir director, and some teachers who will be chaperoning us on the trip. I was done checking in my luggage, so all I had with me was the carry on I was going to be bringing on the plane. It was time to head to our gate. Everyone was saying their last goodbyes to their families.

I said my goodbyes to my parents one by one; my dad gave me a big hug, so big that he lifted me off the ground, then giving me a warm, soft kiss on the forehead. He made this one extra special, knowing that his baby girl will be gone for a week. Looking to my right, I see my mom. She, too, gave me an extra special hug that lasted for 20 seconds. There they were, the tears running down my face like a little baby, staining my mom's favorite shirt. She felt the tears sinking through her shirt, touching her skin, but she didn't care. I honestly couldn't believe I was crying. I won't be seeing them for a week, let alone college for months/years. I tired letting go, but my mom, as overprotective as she was, held on. She whispered in my ear, "Be careful over there okay hunn? I'm sorry that I won't be able to be with you this time, but I know you're going to do great up there when you sing, as you always do. You've made me so proud and you still do. You're a very talented girl and you have this time to share your talents that God gave you to other people. Who knows, maybe you'll meet someone famous. Remember, this is just the beginning. I love you and take care."

Days passed and I was having the time of my life in New York, from sight seeing to watching broadway shows to chowing down on pizza, gelatos, everything edible to bargaining for designer handbags in Chinatown. However, the days we had performances and clinics left me exhausted.

And to think I was having an exciting trip, things started to get even better after this one singing clinic that turned out to be the topping of all those amazing adventures I had. Thinking this was a clinic for all the choir members, my choir director arranged one just for me. I met one of the most famous broadway stars in New York and my eyes widened in astonishment when I first saw her. I could not believe with my own eyes who I was seeing. Besides introducing ourselves, she wanted to hear me sing. My mouth literally dropped and I went into shock as my body froze and everything became dark in my mind. I wasn't sure whether that was a good or bad thing, but I knew I looked like a complete and utter idiot to her. When I snapped out of it, I finally knew what I was feeling; scared, nervous, confused. I could feel the million butterflies flying around in my stomach and my heart was beating as fast as it could that I could hear it through my ears. I wondered whether she could hear it too. This was the moment where I needed my mom right next to me, encouraging me, and tell me to go for it.

But then I thought back to what my mom told me, "You're a very talented girl and you have this time to share your talents that God gave you to other people. Who knows, maybe you'll meet someone famous. Remember, this is just the beginning." 


Repeating the encouraging words my mom told me before I left, in my head, I sang. I gave it my all and it didn't matter to me whether I messed up because I was standing in this very studio with this famous broadway star who was still just a person and she was probably in my shoes once; afraid to sing in front of people alone. Even though I was nervous, it was time to come out my shell and do what I love to do best which is sing, no matter who the person I was singing to was.